The ABD stage

I was surfing yesterday and came across a site that I think would be useful for any prospective doctoral students: http://100rsns.blogspot.com/

The site lists all sorts of reason why one would NOT go to grad school. Glancing through it, I wished I had read it before I came here and started my PhD program. :-P 

Of course, this is not true for everyone, but for some, undertaking a doctoral program is a very tough and sometimes disheartening journey. For me personally, it has been full of ups and downs, and sometimes more down than ups. :-( The coursework was a lot of work, but that's actually the easy part! Comps was draining mentally, but if you are well prepared than you should be able to do it. Post coursework + exam is the hardest part I think.  True, a completed dissertation is the final piece of the puzzle that I have to do to earn my doctorate, but it's the hardest and mostly (unpredictable) part of my PhD journey! I wasn't prepared for the full blast of loneliness that surround me now that I am fully ensconced in my ABD stage. Sometimes I am just hankering for some company among people going through the same stage. There is also a lot of self-doubt and impostor syndrome going on too. You begin to wonder if you made the right decision to forgo five years plus of your life to pursue a PhD at the expense of other things (e.g. in my case, start a family, buy a house and settle down), and the prospect of still coming up empty at the end of the road terrifies you! So near yet so far. It is at this time that you realize that it's important to have good support system (e.g. in my case, my husband and other family members) and to take care of yourself, health-wise (e.g. eat well and get enough sleep & exercise!). I don't regret coming here because I've learnt a lot and I appreciate the training that I get, but I have sacrificed a lot to be here so it's important that I stay positive and not give up hope in order to complete my journey. So the blog really hit home on certain points, and to sum it up: doing a PhD is not for the faint-hearted and requires plenty of patience and optimism along the way.

One day, perhaps, (when I am hopefully done), I will look back and be relieved that I finally got it done. :-)